"No citizen of the United States should refrain from turkey on Thanksgiving Day."
So said Alexander Hamilton, with typical, supercilious disdain for his fellow Americans. I mean, does anyone in America actually like turkey?
No, I didn't think so. It's the most tedious meat imaginable, requiring total submersion in thick gravy or encasement by inch-thick walls of cranberry sauce to be considered even vaguely edible.
Why, then, did Hamilton feel the need to force it down our throats with his pompous speechifying? It's no wonder Aaron Burr shot the man.
Even the of briefest glances at that first Thanksgiving dinner menu would instantly reveal the presence of lobster, clams and fish.
If only Hamilton had said: "No citizen of the United States should refrain from grilled trout on Thanksgiving Day."
Freshwater game versus common fowl? There's no contest. Personally, I'd much prefer to celebrate Trout Day rather than the ignominious and silly sounding Turkey Day.
So that's what I'll be not refraining from on Thursday.