Venous and Arterial

It is remarkable how quickly a patient's self esteem evaporates in hospital: his pride is immediately and unceremoniously lopped off like an ingrown toenail; his dignity is burned away as if it were nothing but a troublesome boil; and then, bereft of both body hair and normal clothes, he is displayed on an adjustable bed for medical study and diagnoses. Any casual observer might conclude that the patient resembles a plucked turkey of the scrawniest kind, basted in antiseptic and wrapped in a sort of Amish drag queen smock.
Then there are the interminable examinations: scheduled pokings and proddings into orifices formerly sacrosanct; and repeated interrogations and pointed questions concerning the movement of the patient's bowels, always conducted with an arched medical eyebrow, as if the patient were a disreputable snitch filing false information on the whereabouts of a gang of crooks.
Under such conditions it is no surprise that the patient loses all his inhibitions. He no longer cares to prevent it all from hanging out. There are prostitutes advertising their wares in the windows of Dutch brothels who are more modest. The patient will agree to any outrage, no matter how absurd it may seem. Personally, if the nurses had told me that it was necessary to undergo heart surgery clad in a child's SpongeBob SquarePants costume I would have silently acquiesced. After all, one's mind begins to retreat into immaturity when someone else must wipe one's backside.

Comments

[Giric]

Thank your lucky stars you are a man and have never had to give birth to children. There is nothing more undignified. Having had three, I can attest that there is nothing, "beautific," about the process. All of the above description's are apt for any woman who has had to go through the process of being pregnant and giving birth. But then hey, I can't even sit at women's gatherings and tell horrific birthing stories, which seems to be the thing most called for at any given female get-together one might attend. I have learned to keep silence, lest I be strung on a gibbet. It seems to be anathema if one spends less than sixteen hours in labor, does not scream or sweat or beat ones man to bits for the hellish notion of getting one pregnant in the first place. I am as one cursed, having spent no longer than two hours getting the job done, then getting up and going home, the same day, to fix supper and do the laundry. Did I mention my 3rd gr. grandma gave birth while on the Oregon Trail in 1849?! Thank you Grandma, very much.
It is sad however to hear that you should suffer such indignities by the cold callousness of some so-called medical professionals. I believe that we are viewed by them as some new specimen of study, no more significant than some insect on the head of a pin, to be treated with a sharp poke, placed in the proper order and skewered for the sake of science.

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It's the nurse responsibility to make you feel welcome in the hospital and not lose your self esteem. I hope you are ok because a loss of self esteem will lead to depression and thus lead to weakened immune system.

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The hospital should have more heart when dealing with the patients. I hope they deal with patients more responsibly.

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