In the kaleidoscopic order of value I call a household budget, bananas are kings of fruit. The prudent shopper can purchase a single, satisfying banana for twenty-five cents; much less than the cost of an overrated apple or a desultory "peach" - a misnomer if I ever heard one. But supreme edibility is not the bananas only claim to greatness.
Its skin, for instance, can be tossed to the floor and employed as the prime mover - literally - in a pratfall gag played against someone you dislike.
Unpeeled, it is possible the propitious shape of your banana might provide entertainment as a makeshift boomerang.
A bunch of unripened bananas worn as a costume offers excellent camouflage for participants in jungle warfare or, perhaps more likely in our case, participants caught in street-to-street fighting inside an urban supermarket.
And finally, if I met you on the street I could present you with a banana as an apology for wasting your time with such piffle as this blog post.