Conventional physics describes the four states of matter as Solid, Liquid, Gas, and Plasma, but regular readers of this blog will be aware of another one: Doesn't Matter.
In fact, despite what those blinkered, white-coated scientists claim, Doesn't Matter is actually the most prevalent state of matter. It is all around us and observable at our every waking moment. Just glance sideways or look down and there it is.
Ironically, Doesn't Matter often manifests itself in the form of something many people consider very important. The news, for example.
The news will drift around the Earth's atmosphere as Doesn't Matter for about a day or two before quickly vaporizing into liquid droplets of globular vacuity then disappearing altogether. Some types of Doesn't Matter news, however, such as celebrity gossip, will become a particularly noxious gas before evaporating, leaving a lingering and unpleasant odor wherever it appears.
Doesn't Matter can perhaps be best understood as a type of Black Hole, except Doesn't Matter usually comprises many boring photographs of jet-set movers and shakers at a party instead of being completely black.
Doesn't Matter experts like myself think that the average person has a greater chance of survival when sucked into a Black Hole than being overwhelmed by Doesn't Matter. After all, surely it is preferable to be zapped into nothingness than reduced to a goggle-eyed zombie that knows everything about what the Kardashians are up to.
Alas, unlike a Black Hole, Doesn't Matter is impossible to avoid. So good luck with that.