Is the glass half full or half empty?
Who the Hell cares? Surely the current level of its contents is less important than contemplating exactly what type of glass it is. After all, a half empty crystal goblet is probably more inspiring than a half full plastic beaker the withered remains of a lemon floating around in it like an unflushed turd.
Similarly, a half empty souvenir champagne flute from last year's vacation to France is a lovelier object to observe than a half full promotional giveaway tumbler advertising a particular brand of nasal decongestant. (Unless you're the kind of weirdo who collects kitsch drinking vessels, I suppose).
And what if the half full glass has a chipped rim, making it dangerous to drink from? There are so may variables to take into account with this very imprecise glass half full or half empty scenario
But, regardless, we should really just be thankful that we have any kind of glassware at all; and that we have access to non-poisonous liquids with which we may consider them to be half full or half empty depending on our mood. For that is not the case in many parts of the world these days, where unfortunates are forced to sup tainted water from a rusty pipe in their own cupped hands.
So bottoms up, as they oxymoronically say.