Economic Analysis

As you know, the US dollar is so weak that even the Chilean peso can kick financial sand in its face. Indeed, so puny is the US dollar that the effete and ineffectual pound sterling calls it a fag every day without fear of reprisal. The US dollar also can't run properly, it fights like a girl, and it collects sea shells instead of dead frogs and bits of grimy string like the Nepalese rupee does. In fact, the US dollar is so weak that it needs the help of the Japanese yen to loosen the tops of its ketchup bottles for it. The US dollar is always made to be the squaw when the other international currencies play cowboys and Indians, except when it isn't allowed out because it's caught a slight chill helping its mom prune flowers in the garden. No longer known colloquially as "Buck," the US dollar's new nickname is "Wendy." The US dollar's favorite color is pink, especially if it's frilly. And, as Hamlet said, his pockets bulging with valuable Danish krone: "Frailty, thy name is US dollar."

Comments

[Dr Maroon]

If it was in jail with the Euro...

Why are the florists of Connecticut after you? I'll tell you. Because you said the dollar was out "pruning" flowers with its mommy.
They say you CUT flowers. The florists of Connecticut will pursue you now forever.

[OutOfContext]

I don't know, I still think it's kind of cute.

[yarb]

Unbelievable! I was just thinking I would very much to like send some flowers to my aunt in Connecticut. But how?

[Carter]

That silent 'c' hiding in the middle of Connecticut has always irritated me.

Should we toss all future comments on this this post? I have a wacky anecdote involving Albert G.