Politics is a subject I file in the same cabinet of curiousities as UFOs, the Loch Ness Monster, Crop Circles and other unexplained phenomena; subjects that are quite entertaining to study from time to time, but you wouldn't want to become immersed in such absurd esoterica or, heaven forfend, actually start to believe the reams of nonsense written by its maniacally obsessive chroniclers. Too much foolishness quickly turns very tedious indeed.
Much as I am loathe to quote David Frost, he once accurately described the British political contest between Alec Douglas Home and Harold Wilson as a choice between dull Alec and smart-Aleck; and, alas, we are limited to similarly uninspiring options in our own 2012 Presidential election (although I am not always sure which of President Obama and Governor Romney is the dull Alec and which the smart-Aleck).
Romney, in particular, is an unappealing candidate: the ghost of a ersatz politician; a human-shaped white sheet floating in space; the restless shade of a used car salesman condemned to haunt the windswept lot for eternity, trying to sell that old Ford Edsel that nobody really wanted. Barack Obama, by the same token, is the sort of drearily punctual revenant that manifests itself every April, ominously pointing at the mailbox to remind people to pay their taxes.
In fact, when it comes right down to it, most politicians are either cold, damp spots in the room or noisy, obnoxious poltergeists. Where's an Exorcist - or Deliverance Minister as they are euphemistically called these days - when you need one?
