There is so much free theater on the streets right now. The Red Players, The Blue Company, and The Purple Ensemble are showcasing alfresco productions of their own Coronavirus opinions for anyone who cares to watch. Alas, it's all predictable, over-emoted melodrama. There is no dialogue, just a series of monotonous soliloquies yelled at the audience, the spotlight swinging wildly around the makeshift stage, searching for the actor with the loudest voice. Numerous Greek choruses wearing masks of tragedy wait in the wings. I think this might be Act Thirty-Seven, Scene Twelve, but I'm not sure. The prompter has apparently already lost his place in the script.
Fortunately, there is also a lot of free mime to enjoy. For instance, I was walking my dog the other day when an elaborately masked mime appeared about ten feet behind us on the sidewalk. Whenever I stopped at a tree to let my dog sniff neighborhood smells, the mime stopped also, like a living statue, artfully maintaining his ten-foot distance as if separated from me by an invisible bargepole. Then, when sniffing was complete and the dog and I resumed our walk, the mime suddenly sprang back into motion and resumed his perambulations also, always ten feet behind. Highly entertaining if you're a fan of Samuel Beckett.
The other mime who puts on a good show is the in-your-face, confrontational non-mask wearer. I saw his production, entitled 'Bull In A China Shop,' at my local grocery store. It featured the starkly maskless mime shunting a shopping cart containing nothing but frozen TV dinners down the narrow aisles, in the wrong direction, daring anyone to challenge him for ignoring the store's Coronavirus policies. At fifteen minute intervals, a recorded voice on the store's PA system reminded shoppers to wear a mask, keep their distance, and follow directional arrows in the aisles, and each time this announcement was made the maskless mime presented a conspicuous and repudiatory finger to wherever he thought the voice was coming from. A bravura performance.
My play is of little interest, essentially being a comedy of manners which is so out of fashion these days. I stroll about the stage making my own risk assessments of the situations I encounter, trying to be respectful of the risk assessments of others. There is only a single prop: a blue neckerchief I pull over my nose and mouth when I'm around people who care and pull slip below my chin when there's nobody in the immediate vicinity. It won't win any Oscars for Costume Design but I find it to be easy, effective, and relatively non-controversial.
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