Nobody, thank the Lord, is actually equipped with a 'moral compass.' Such a facile device would turn us all into those toga-clad, preternaturally serene automatons from science-fiction films who live in post-apocalyptic, bucolic harmony on terraformed future worlds. The systematic sententious tedium would be enough to drive anyone possessed of their own mind quite mad.
What we do have, for our sins, are moral bowls of spaghetti with a choice of prepared sauces that makes a big mess when being eaten. You're a simple Cacio e Pepe person; I prefer meaty Bolognese; they like all that rich, creamy gloop. Nevertheless, we all get to sit at the table and enjoy our meals in relative peace and quiet.
At least we did until despotic, ladle-wielding baboons in the kitchen came up with excuses to curtail the menu. We ordered our right and wrongs served with nuanced, subtle flavors and aromas, but now the sauces on offer are either completely tomato-based or submerged in thick Bechamel cream, one dollop each, no exceptions. From an all-you-can-eat buffet of roasted dialectics to a restricted diet of microwaved sounds bites, our food for thought is neither nourishing nor nutritious nowadays.
And to cap it all, the filthy philosophical pots and pans are still piled high in the sink. After all, who in their right mind would volunteer to be scullery maid for that impossibly thankless task? We could, I suppose, invest in an automatic moral dishwasher featuring express rinse cycle and open-door air dry. A convenient contraption, no doubt, but really no different than the aforementioned facile moral compass. Besides, there would be too many arguments about how to load the racks that we'd never get around to turning the damned thing on, so what's the point?
Ah, so many gadgets, so little humanity. There is some transhumanity, obviously, and rather too much subhumanity for my liking, but not much is left of the conventional humanity I was told about in school. Clearly it starved to death while navigating the moral maze with that facile moral compass that does not exist. If only it had fortified itself with a backpack full of righteous cakes and ale instead, then we might finally be getting somewhere.
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